I left a letter somewhat resembling one from that of “Dear Jane”, for a friend to find on her laptop when she awoke that day…

“Ode to a taco supreme”

Dear friend,

I don’t want to seem mean or disturbing in any way, but I have some news….

You are a wonderful friend and I would never do anything to harm you, and in immense guilt I must relinquish onto you this confession…

I ATE YOUR TACO SUPREME….

I am ashamed… but I have justification to my behavior….

You abandoned said taco supreme and left it to fend for itself in the wild safari of your coffee table….

Strewn about carelessly amongst mountains of disheveled clothing and and bags of books…

With the constant glare of the tv at its back as it journeyed to find a better taco supreme home…

Granted it was neatly folded into a paper wrapper, and in a plastic bag….

Alas a jacket does not serve as protection from the cruelty and injustices of the world, and from the ravenous creatures that would devour such an innocent taco supreme…

This behavior was a flagrant disregard for the custodial obligations required of one to responsibly care for a taco supreme, in all its sour cream goodness…

Out of mercy, I took the jubilant glint of light out of the taco’s eyes, and ate it…. To put end to all its pain and suffering of becoming soggy, or whats worse… thrown away…

It is with heavy heart that I reveal this onto you, as your name were the last words upon its dying cheesy breath…

You can thank me later…